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5 reasons to root against the Tampa Bay Lightning in the Stanley Cup Final

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"Tampa Bay" isn't even a damn city. It's like calling them the Delaware River Flyers.

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1. Their stupid ticket policy.

The Tampa Bay Lightning have a good fan base -- despite what you may think of their Florida roots. The team finished 9th in the NHL in attendance in 2014-15, selling out 98 percent of their seats for the entire season. They have a strong season ticket base and they are a good hockey market. This isn't really up for debate.

Something else not up for debate: the Blackhawks have a lot more fans. And lots of people from Chicago live in Florida, because let's face it, Chicago is a pretty miserable place for like ... half the dang year. That means that the Lightning are faced with the threat of Blackhawks fans filling up their arena during the Stanley Cup Final, just like they did in Anaheim during the Western Conference Final.

So they do crap like this:

Amalie Arena is located in Tampa, FL. Sales to this event will be restricted to residents of Florida. Residency will be based on credit card billing address. Orders by residents outside the selected area will be canceled without notice and refunds given.

...

Chase Club and Lexus Lounge ticket holders: Please note that for all 2015 NHL Playoff Games at Amalie Arena only Tampa Bay Lightning team apparel (or neutral) will be permitted in these club and adjoining seating areas. Fans wearing visiting team apparel will be asked to remove them while in these areas.

This doesn't mean that there's a straight-up ban on Chicago (or during previous rounds, New York or Detroit or Montreal) apparel in the building, but it does apply for certain seats. You don't see cities like New York or Philadelphia, or even markets that have had attendance issues in the past like Pittsburgh or Boston or Washington, doing this stuff.

Have some confidence in your fan base to keep the opposition out without gimmicks, guys.

2. seriously with this

3. Stanley doesn't need a f*cking tan.

tan

tan

It's a piece of metal. It doesn't have melanin, or even skin. Sun just makes it hot to the touch, and we want the Stanley Cup champs to be able to touch the damn thing, right?

And it's summer in Chicago too. They even have a beach there!

You're all stupid.

4. Revenge for 2004.

The Flyers were the better team, damn it, and that series should have gone the other way.

5. No Cup for Carle, Coburn ... and a Cup for Kimmo.

Braydon Coburn and Matt Carle were good defensemen for the Flyers -- yes, even though you hate them because they turned the puck over a bunch, they are both top four defensemen in the NHL ... the Flyers sure could use two of those type of players right now, huh? -- but we don't want multiple ex-Flyers winning the Cup again, do we?

Sure, an ex-Flyer will win the Cup if the Blackhawks win, but that's Kimmo Timonen. It's different. In fact ... the Lightning winning the Cup means that Kimmo won't win ... and that's just not right. Go Kimmo. Go Chicago.

FIVE REASONS TO ROOT AGAINST CHICAGO.